OUI mas non

Walking on the Cabo Branco beach sidewalk with Edda, I like to read what people's T-shirts say. One lady's shirt said:
 

OUI!!! 

mais non 

Usually the messages are in English, many times not understood by their wearers, but I was happy to 

Hold Your Breath

Hold your breath! Try it!

Air is one of the most precious substances we have, not because it is rare, but because five minutes without it we die.

But if you hold on to your breath as if it were yours, your air to keep forever, you die. But if you let it go, for family to breath, for animals to breath, for trees to breath, then it brings life.

Things of this world, things of our life are like that. They are not ours forever, yet we hold on to them as if our life depended on it. We hoard, we keep, we lose sleep and time over things we misplace or lose.

They are like the air we breath. Your clothes are to use and pass to someone else. Your money flows in and flows out. Your books are to be read and then be read by others.Your car carries you place, then it carries someone else places.

Hold on to things with a death grip, then death they will bring. Old clothes clutter our closets, loads of money will be swindled from you by thieves or taken by the government. Your books will get dusty and molded, giving you allergies, and your car will rust and break down.

Oh, for the freedom to enjoy a blessing, to let it go, to bless another, bestow life to oneself and to others. What a breath of fresh air! 

But vs. And

Son, I love you so much, but I want you to clean your room.

Think about it: "but" negates everything that comes before it. It is an adversative conjunction, that is, it connects opposing phrases.

Use "and" - it is an additive conjunction, connecting phrases, one affirming the other or one building upon the other.

Son, I love you so much, and when you clean your room, it makes me so happy. 

If you have to use to use "but," start with the negative.

Son, your room is an awful mess, but I still love you so much.

Missed

Creating a habit, like writing daily this blog, takes constant renewal until the act is ingrained into the today. I missed a day, too busy, too tired when I finally got home, not inspired enough, any reason. I had the desire to make it up the following day for the illusion of an unbroken line of posts.

A true habit, though, is not dependent on strategies of this sort: better to leave perfectionism behind and live the moment, better to own one's own holes, better not to cover old holes by digging new ones, and better to start again, and start again, and start again until the habitual simply happens.

I am here, Today, welcome!

The Perfect Idea

Driving my car, listening to a podcast, I happened upon the perfect idea for the blog today. It just popped into my head seemingly out of nowhere, an idea, so simple, yet beautiful, illustrating true value of life - where did it come from? I don't know.

I thought, "Yes! This is what I'll write on the blog, what I'll leave for future generations."

I stopped the car, bought some screws, got back into the car, and my idea, my perfect idea - where did it go? I don't know.

I thought, and thought, and thought. I relistened to the same podcast, hoping it would trigger the idea - nothing!

I said at my trusty, yellow notebook on the passenger seat, "Why did I not trust you with my idea?"

So many great ideas get lost in the clutter of the day!

God is King over Everything… Well, Almost

God is Creator; everything belongs to Him. 

He is King; He rules over all the universe. The sun, the stars, the galaxy all do His bidding, all of nature, trees, plants, birds, fish, and animals behave according to His design. Every created being lives in obedience to the King, except one, mankind.

Pride and selfishness thwart God’s Kingship in this world. We were created in such a way that we get a choice whether to serve the King or not, but we don’t use that freedom to honor our Creator. God will be your King if you obey Him. 

If He is what you want, then each day you must crown Him King in your life. If not, then enjoy the perks of this world while you can, because they short lived.

All Good Things...

Today we got together, looked at old photos, laughed, sang, prayed, ate maracuja mousse, and took the Supper for one last time together, possibly the happiest ending a congregation could have.

The Manaira congregation began in May 2008; its purpose to provide an early meeting time for restaurant workers to participate before going to work.

It began with a simple question: Irene, can we start a church meeting at your beauty salon? The next Sunday we met, a brand new simple congregation. Over the next 11 and half years, hundreds of people visited our Sunday meeting, we started a restaurant Bible study, we did campaigns in the workers’ hometown, Esperança, had love feasts, and all the offerings went to help people in need or to buy Bibles. We had exciting times, sad times, laughing crises and just plain crises. People came to Christ; people moved away.

In the last few years though, the meeting ceased to serve its purpose with the restaurant workers; others moved away or some moved on. We the faithful remnant finally realized that we are all meeting already with the Luna congregation. The great thing about a house church is that to end is as simple as reminiscing and giving out hugs.

And the maracuja mousse – everybody loved it! The mousse was made from the maracuja fruit from our vine, the vine came from the seeds from a maracuja that we got from Luis, and Luis used to meet with the Manaira congregation about seven or eight years ago.

Only God knows how much seed was sown in these eleven years, how many people were influenced by Christ, and where they are producing fruit in the world. As for us, not having a church building frees us to start somewhere else, somewhere where there is good soil. Let our Great Farmer-of-Men guide us.

Oh, by the way, some good things keep on giving even after they end.

Not All Fun and Games

Life can throw you some harrowing experiences, like when the car was stolen from me at gunpoint on my birthday. My wife Edda had violent nightmares for a month after that. Or the time my brother David, walking downtown Serra Talhada during a mission campaign, saw a man gunned down right in front of him. Some people seeing that would be afraid to leave the house.

Nightmares, panic attacks or agoraphobia are all symptoms of PTSD (Post-traumatic Stress Disorder), which can afflict people for days, weeks, months or even years, but they don't have to.

PSTD is like a loop in the brain that keeps flashing the feelings created during the trauma to the forefront. It can be paralyzing, but the loop is disrupted by playing a simple, classic video game: Tetris, the one with the falling blocks.

According to Jane McGonigal, who researches the therapeutic benefits of games, if a person plays twenty minutes of Tetris within six hours of the trauma, the chances of having PSTD are zero. The colors, the music, the problem-solving feature of the game activate different parts of the brain, sort of like giving it permission to focus on something else.

The game may work somewhat up to twenty-four hours after the trauma if a person imagines the experience and the emotions that came with it and then plays Tetris.

I keep Tetris on my cell, and I make anybody who has had a scare play it. Who knows, I could be saving him or her a lot of headache later on.

I 💗 Grass

My nephew Mathias made me a shirt that says: "I 💗 Grass" for Christmas.

The story behind the shirt:  when I played kickball with the kids in the yard, I would pick dandelions growing in the grass and eat them. Not only are dandelions nutrition and delicious, there was the extra advantage of grossing out my sister's kids. I like being the weird uncle that eats "grass."

There are about 400,000 species of plants in the earth, and more than half are edible; yet human beings eat only a very small number of them. Only three provide more than half of the plant calories people consume, corn, rice, and wheat.

I love to discover a new wild edible and taste it: harebell, wild onion, fireweed, wild stawberry, etc. I also got from my sister a wild plant recipe book. What a joy it would be to make a whole salad of weeds plucked from my yard and freak my nephews and nieces out.

The Chase

September 17, 1965, two kids were married. And three years later, I was born. This year Mom and Dad celebrated 54 years together.

"So Dad, what do you remember about your wedding?"

"Well, I was only 19, and we got married at the Scottsboro church of Christ. The preacher, ................,  did the ceremony. You know, he committed suicide."

"Right after he married you and Mom?"

"Nah, it was years later. I don't remember why or nothing, but I do remember he killed himself."

"Did you have a reception?"

"Yes, we did, down on the farm. Everybody went and had cake, but Linda and I didn't stay long."

"Why not?"

"Linda's brothers, your uncles, kept talking about kidnapping me and taking me down to the river. So we got out of there."

"Did they dress up your car?"

"Oh yeah! cans and shaving cream."

"Where did ya'll spend the night?"

 "We were driving out toward Murphreesboro on Nolenville's Road, we found a motel. It was a dump. I've been down that way, looking for it. It's probably been torn down."

"Didn't someone chase you and Mom all over town?"

"Yes, Talmage and Carolyn McClelland, Bobbie and Faye Riddle, ....................... - They were our best friends."

"How did you lose them?"

"We hid in an alley downtown. I sorta wish we had let them catch us."

"Why? What would they have done?"

"I have no idea, but it would have been fun."

A Little More Nice

"Joseph, we need more people like you in the world."

I hadn't done anything, nothing worth mentioning. I just went a little out of my way home to get someone a better bus stop. Didn't expect to be treated like a self-sacrificing hero.

"No," I answered, "we need more people like Jesus in the world."

I went a couple of blocks out of my way to make someone's life a little easier - Nothing! Jesus put his God essence on hold to become flesh, to completely sacrifice himself to give people eternal life.

What would this world be like if people wholly gave themselves to the humility, the service, the peace, and love of Jesus? It would be heaven

Bringing a little more nice to the world through your life could be a small step in that direction.

Resolution

The only resolution that ever worked for me was not New Year's resolutions, not making shoot-at-the-moon goals, not using sheer force of will to become a perfect person, but small, daily practices, repeated for a short period of time, like a month or better, a week.

Going back to my vitamin experience, I bought  a B vitamin complex with 300 pills, 5 years ago. I figured that 300 pills, given the missed days, would last me about a year. I am still taking them. They have expired; I have refrigerated them, and I am still taking them. They have lost their potency, but I am going to finish them and celebrate the throwing away the empty bottle with confetti.

Finally I am getting close, and the reason is that I hardly miss a vitamin day, now that I have a week-long daily vitamin dispenser.

If I wait till the beginning of the year to make changes, that is a big decision requiring a lot of concentration and constant focus, day in and day out, and long term memory and commitment. Too much actually because I wouldn't pass the tenth day.

If I wait till the beginning of the month to begin a change, like this blog, started on September 1st - I kept it up for 9 days, then I missed a day, and then another and now the beginning of the month is here and I'm going for another run.

But what if I vitaminized the habits I want to create? Start each week with the goal to not miss a day. Oh, I will miss a day, but 6 days are better than none. Five days, four days, even three days for better than none. And I just have to keep it up for a week, and then I start over until it is a habit, little concentration and will power needed.

That is what works for me.

A Little Each Day vs. A Lot Each Week

I was a kid in a congregation in Joelton, TN, that kept track of daily Bible readers. Each Sunday someone counted how many read a chapter a day during the week. Anyone who read seven chapters a week counted.

I remember forgetting to read the whole week and then right before going to the meeting, speed reading seven chapters. I hated feeling bad about not raising my hand. Hey, it counted. But did it?

Today I take daily vitamins that are supposed to boost my immune system, keep my cholesterol down, and make me healthier. I keep them in a dispenser with seven compartments for the seven days of the week.

Last week, I forgot a day. What do I do? Do I double up the intake the following day? Vitamin overdose! No, that day passed without the extra nutrition that my body could have used. It's gone for good. Sure, one day isn't going to make a difference, but the point is: a small daily practice will go a lot further than a catching up once a week.

Which is better, to pray 15 minutes a day or 1 hour and 15 minutes on Saturday? The same amount of time, God may answer the same, but the effect in me will be greater with the daily practice.

Which is better, to read a Bible chapter a day, or 7 chapters on Sunday? Same amount of time, the same message from God, but the effect in me will be greater with the daily practice.

A missed day of doing that which I know is important is a missed day, never again to be recuperated. Each day is a building block. In the building up of my life, there are several blocks missing.

Manners Matter

I became exasperated raising my kids, trying to get them to say please and thank you. I reminded them thousands of times to say the magic word, I tried ignoring them until they said it, I made up a little song to irritate them until they said it, but it seemed like all my efforts were in vain. They liked ordering each other around too much.

Whenever I came across a kid who used manners well – yes, sir, thank you, sir, may I, sir? – that kid would shine like a light in the midst of a generation that prides itself in saying awful things about people’s mothers, using slang and back talk to be cool. My kids at least didn’t take up the trash talk, but they also didn’t seem inclined to take the next step towards courtesy.

Then one day someone came up to me said, “You did a great job with your kids. They have such good manners.” And after several more comments like that, I came to the conclusion that they in fact did learn courtesy; they just pretended not to have it when they were with me. Or maybe they felt so at home with me that adding nice words didn’t really add much in their minds.

Anyways, whether it is pleasantries, or table manners, or gentlemanly behavior, or walking the elderly across the street, manners matter because they make you stand out like a diamond in the dirt.